Abortion

Dear Future Offspring,

No, I haven’t stopped writing to you. I just stopped posting it here, online, where other people can read it. I just thought it disrespectful to you, letting everyone else read what is meant only for you.

But then here I go again. It’s because, well, this letter, I think this might be the last one. I have to stop writing to you, not because I feel pathetic, writing to a non-existential persona, but because, I’m afraid that maybe you won’t be existing at all, ever.

Fortunately, or unfortunately for you my dear, I have decided to be single for the rest of my life. Anak, sorry, it’s not that I don’t want to have you, believe me, I do — I even have thought of naming you Othello or Fitzwilliam (I haven’t thought of a girl’s name yet :P). But then, I think I may somewhat disapprove of the whole husband idea.

I wish I could further explain to you, where all this is coming from. But then it breaks my heart that I feel bad whenever I talk about someone, even if that’s all he ever makes me feel recently.

I hope to have a change of heart soon. But I guess it’s farewell for now.

XOXO,
Your Supposedly Mom

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